Way before I was married - I always thought breastfeeding was gross and disgusting and there would be no way that anyone could ever get me to breastfeed. I just don't think I was around a lot of breastfeeding mothers growing up and never quite understood the difference between formula feeding and breastfeeding. Well when I got married and became pregnant - my opinion vastly changed and I knew that this was something I wanted to do. And I set a goal to breastfeed my baby for at least a year. I was scared and nervous because you hear all the horror stories of it hurting, of your milk never coming in, or just never get the hang of it. But I was determined to make it work - and I read all the material that was placed before me and I even drug Bobby to a breastfeeding class when I was in my third trimester.
Well once Emma was born - we had the hardest time in the beginning. I guess I became one of those horror stories but with a happy ending. We had serious latching issues from the get go. And even though I had a lot of support - it was difficult. I don't know if anyone recalls the story of us going to the breastfeeding clinic and me telling the nurse to shut up after she told me to have a great day after she told me that I should try formula. Oh that was a fun day but I sure made my husband proud of me! But I also had a great pediatrician who in the pediatric world is known as the breastfeeding nazi! I also had my awesome mother-in-law who I could just ask, am I doing this right? And to encourage me that through my hormonal and sleep deprived state that I was in fact getting it right. And then above all, Bobby was seriously so supportive through the whole process. Waking up with me during night feedings to hold my hand or rub my back when I was in excruciating pain. Or just telling me what a good job I was doing in providing food for our daughter.
If I recall correctly, it took us about 2 months for everything to FINALLY work naturally. I think the biggest issue was in the beginning we never got the latch down right and realizing that they gave me the wrong size shield at the breastfeeding clinic to help with our latch - which ended up doing A LOT of damage!
Well then I went back to work full time when Emma was 9 weeks old and that put all the odds against us. I then entered the world of pumping....bleh! I soon realized that I could not pump enough milk to make up for what Emma was eating while I was at work. And boy did that leave us in a lot of tears, fenugreek, mother's milk tea, blessed thistle, some more tears, and anything else that might help me produce more milk. When Emma was about 6 months, we had to start supplementing a little formula. She only had to have 3 formula bottles a week and the rest was my milk. But I remember mixing those formula bottles just being so hard for me and just the stress while I was pumping to try and produce enough for my sweet baby girl (which the stress probably did not help at all!)
Well 13 months and 5 days later - I can say that we are still going strong and in the process of weaning. We are down to 2-3 feedings a day and I no longer have to pump at work (HALLELUJAH!). But I can tell you what a big advocate I am of breastfeeding and how important it is to surround yourself with support.
About a week or so ago, I probably received such a great compliment from my friend and another lactation consultant. When my friend, Michelle, found out she was pregnant last year and decided she wanted to try breastfeeding, I told her that I would help her through it and would help her do whatever it took to help her to be successful in feeding her little guy. So right before he was born, she was asking my advice and I was giving it all to her. I was seriously afraid that I was going to overwhelm her but she reassured me that she wanted to be as prepared as possible. Even after Gavin (Michelle's little guy) was born, I kept giving tips and suggestions for how to tackle certain nursing problems. Well when Michelle went to the lactation consultant for help and relayed what I had already told her to do, the consultant replied that it must be great to have a friend who was an expert at breastfeeding. You have no idea how great a compliment that was to me - after everything I had been through in the beginning (the tears and the joys) - I have come out on the other end as an expert. As every nursing mommy does! You just learn to roll with the punches and adapt as necessary. Breastfeeding can be a difficult journey but it has the biggest rewards in the end!
Thanks for reading about my journey - it's funny how in the start of it I wanted nothing to do with breastfeeding and how in the end, through my experience, I have become such a big advocate for it!
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